The Warden

Last night DJ and I were watching television and laughed out loud at something. A few seconds later I heard the sound of footsteps and looked over to see Noah standing in the doorway with his hip cocked and his hand on his hip.

"Yes?", I said.

" Umm... you DO know it's ten o'clock?", replied Noah.

**DJ and I glanced at each other blankly**

"Yes, we do know that."

**moment of silence while Noah still stood with his hand on his hip glaring accusingly at the two of us**

" Is there a reason you are up other than to remind us it is ten o'clock?", I finally managed.

"Yes, my water bottle is empty and I need some more."

**I filled his water bottle and handed it back to him and he began marching back down the hallway but as he left, he interjected:

"It's getting REALLY late!"

I had to resist the overwhelming urge to stamp my feet and whine, " But, I don't WANNA go to BE-ED!"

The Linguist

Noah was playing with his friend Logan today and Logan's mom told us that she went to check on them and Noah said, " Guess what? I can speak Chinese!"

"That's great! Say something in Chinese for me." replied Logan's mom.

Noah's response?

"Hola! Como estas?"

Great job, Noah, great job.

Must be the little-known Tijuana dialect of Mandarin.

Ladybug, Ladybug, Fly Away Home

Here is a beautiful ladybug I caught in the pea patch when we went to Johnson's Farm. She is working.... look closely, there are aphids on the plant and I believe she has one in her mouth.

Here are a few more pictures from that trip-we picked strawberries, cherries and peas. Sorry I am just now getting around to this, we went back in June.

(Zoe eating one of the cherries)

Betrayal Behind Enemy Lines

The day started out as any other- beautiful and sunny. DJ and I were sitting in the shade in lawn chairs in the front yard. DJ was watching Noah, his friend Logan and Logan's older brother Brian play with light sabres while I read a book.

Suddenly, I heard distant giggles and what sounded like a battle cry. I glanced up from my read to see something flying toward our yard from across the street.

"Incoming", I casually said and went back to my book just as a water balloon crashed and exploded in front of the three boys. Logan's dad and older sister, Kristen, had launched an attack from their front yard. The boys squealed with delight while DJ barked a call to "man your stations!". Thus began the Battle of the Pine Barrens.

Logan, Noah and DJ scrambled to the water faucet with balloons while Brian embarked on a covert mission to sneak behind enemy lines and confiscate a sling shot. All the while I, General Mom-battlefield commander, felt confident in my troops' ability to protect me and my perch and neither moved nor but down my book.

It was messy- water bombs were exploding all around me, people were soaked and squealing, but the battled waged on. Brian returned from his mission victorious with the sling shot and the boys immediately attached it to the fence posts and began launching water balloons across the street.

DJ was filling and tying the balloons while the three boys were launching them. Suddenly, Noah grabbed a balloon and took off running across the street in what seemed like a suicide mission. I gave my first official order of the campaign and told him to come back with the water balloon and put it in the sling shot. Brian broke rank and informed me that it was okay, because Noah was infantry. I told Noah to carry on and watched as my only son went forth to what was certain to be a good soaking.

Amazingly, Noah made it behind the enemy lines without much damage. Then I saw him grab some of their water balloons and come running back to our side. The boys were cheering thinking Noah had stolen ammo when Noah pelted them with the balloons!

"We have a traitor!", Brian yelled and Noah took off back across the street to his new home with Kristen and Logan's dad. Noah commandeered the water hose and posted himself at the fence edge and anyone coming within four feet of the enemy fence was sprayed with water.

The soldiers were growing weary and the ops tempo began to slow. Everyone was soaked except for General Mom and Noah. Brian and Logan were trying hard to get Noah, but he was holding fast with the hose, keeping everyone away.

Finally, with great authority, I ( General Mom) closed my book, left my command post and said, "Give me two balloons!". The soldiers quickly complied. I slowly marched across the street with the balloons behind my back. Noah never took his eyes off me. As I approached, he turned off the hose and said, " Hi, Mommy!".

I replied, " Hi, Noah" and pelted him with two water balloons. A split second passed where what had just transpired dawned on him and then a sulk washed across his face and he said, "Owwww! You're my MOM!"

I smiled and said, "Traitors never win!" and that signalled the end of the Great Pine Barrens Water Battle of 2009 and once again, General Mom came out on top!

I think there is a moral to this story, but I'm not sure what it is. ( Cheaters never win. Mom is always right. You pick.)

Lighthouses

I am not sure exactly when my love of lighthouses began, but I suspect it began because of the movie Pete's Dragon. I loved that movie as a child and watched it every time it came on television. I have had a romantic perception of them as long as I can remember. It is very hard to put into words that which is not meant to be put into words, but the best I can do is to say that I find them romantic, lonely, haunting, everlasting, comforting, warm, strong and beautiful.

I grew up near the Bolivar Lighthouse on Bolivar Peninsula in Texas and always looked forward to passing it when we were waiting in line for the ferry to Galveston.(this is not my photo, I got it from an internet search for images)
The summer after I graduated college, I was fortunate enough to go on a month-long trip and see many lighthouses that dot the west coast from the border with Canada down to Los Angeles. What a trip that was!!

Our visit to the Cape May lighthouse on Sunday just reaffirmed my love for them and I wanted to share the pictures I took of it as well as a poem I penned about lighthouses some years ago.

Last night I had a moving dream

of a lighthouse by the sea.

It's beauty and it's aura

seemed to call out to me.

For I was a ship lost at sea

in a horrific torrential storm.

I prayed for something to save me

for something to keep me warm.

Weathered and beaten I struggled and fought

to keep myself afloat.

But the angry surf tossed me about

No mercy for this pitiful boat.

Just as I had given up

surrendered to the relentless tide.

I caught a glimpse of safety

a beacon as my guide.

It's flawless beauty beckoned me

steering me away from harm.

The waves around me seemed to disappear

as I moved towards its outstretched arms.

The amazing strength of the structure

took my breath away.

I was challenged by the sea again and again

but never falling prey.

Mesmerized by its beauty,

I wanted to stay awhile.

For it mended my heart, it filled my soul

And colored my world with a smile.

I'm comforted by it's promise

to faithfully provide me with light.

And I hope that love will forever shine

as my beacon in the night.

Canned Humor

I, personally, think vegetables and fruit taste better fresh off the bush/tree/vine. There is just something about knowing that it slept in the patch last night. My son does not agree with me.

Our neighbors have a garden with quite a few different vegetables. Yesterday, Noah was over there playing with their little boy who is the same age. Logan kept swiping green beans right off the plant and eating them. Not forgetting his manners, he offered Noah one every time he ate one. Noah politely refused. Logan's dad told us that after several attempts by Logan to get Noah to eat a green bean, Noah finally said, " No, thanks! I only eat green beans out of a can!"

The Young Girls and the Sea

Before we left Cape May on Sunday, we drove down to the lighthouse and walked around on the beach. There was a bridal party there taking pictures. It was a beautiful day and I was thinking the pictures would probably be beautiful, but was hoping the wedding had already taken place as the bride was getting sand all over her dress! After a few minutes, the bride and her bridal party decided to take a walk in the surf for some pictures. Now, this isn't like Texas where you simply walk out on packed sand to the surf. The sand was very deep and soft and there was an actual shelf where the waves were breaking against the shore. You had to climb down the shelf which was about two feet high to get to the surf.

I watched with amusement and happened to have my camera because I was taking pictures of the lighthouse and the kids. I didn't have my zoom lens, so I've had to crop the photos in order to zoom in on them, but I thought the progression of shots was somewhat amusing and thought I'd share. (click each individual picture to enlarge it and get a better view)

I'm sure this was a beautiful shot:

But, umm, don't they say to NEVER turn your back on the sea??

Is it wrong that this was what I was waiting for and I was delighted to get this picture??

That's gonna be SOME drycleaning bill... sand and salt water on silk!

"You know, now there's a pretty hungry little billy goat goat goat goat goat goat."**

The camping was fun overall. It was our first time out with the camper so we were working out the kinks and learned some lessons. (i.e. pack heavier blankets, ask how far the bathrooms are from your spot, figure out why the heater won't work, figure out why the sink won't drain and most importantly, just don't take the kids next time!)

We had loads of wind Saturday night and several times I pictured the bed pop outs becoming wings similar to The Flying Nun and waking up to singing munchkins in the merry ole land of Oz. At three a.m. I did wake to the sound of rain and thunder off in the distance. I peeked out the window and saw lightning, so I got out of bed and pulled up the radar on the laptop. There were some pretty intense storms with loads of rain and lightning, but, amazingly, I watched them part like the Red Sea and go around us. It all went to the north of us and one nasty little cell went to the south of us in the Delaware Bay. That was the storm I was hearing off in the distance. It was warmer Saturday night, so we didn't freeze. In fact, we were a little hot because we had to zip up all the vinyl sides because of the rain.


My focus, though, is on Zoe. That child is going to be the death of me. In my post earlier this week regarding the kids' personalities, I referred to Zoe using a picture of the Tasmanian Devil. I would like to take this moment to rescind that and instead insert this picture with her name:

That is Tex Avery's little billy goat in his cartoon, Billy Boy. The goat spends the entire cartoon destroying anything and everything in site. My reason for this comparison is because in the coarse of a weekend, Zoe managed to mutilate three of Noah's toys and an item of mine.

Noah got a rocket for his birthday that you can pump up and soar for long distances. We brought it along thinking it would be the perfect place for him to play with it since our yard is not that big and it would most certainly end up in someone else's yard if he played with it at home. Friday afternoon, the kids played with it and we brought it indoors Friday evening when we were getting ready for bed. Suddenly, Noah started crying and we found Zoe with the rocket ( foam and cardboard) eating the cardboard wings off it. No, not TEARING.... EATING!!

This is the same kid (pun intended) that spent at least 4 months obsessed with the padding that lies under the carpet. We have an area rug in the living room with carpet padding underneath and as soon as Zoe could crawl, she would go to the corner, pull up the rug and EAT the padding! Nothing we tried kept her away from it, she kept sneaking over there and eating it and we never understood what the fascination was.

About an hour after the rocket incident, Noah started crying again. For some unknown reason, Noah packed his own bag and must have just run around his room randomly grabbing things to pack. One of the items was a small snow globe he got for Christmas with his name on it. Zoe picked it up, said, " BALL!" and smashed it!

Saturday evening, I went off on a long hike to the restroom to brush my teeth, wash my face and get ready to go to my concert. When I got back to the camper, DJ was playing with Noah. Zoe was sitting in the dinette area smiling broadly with my glasses on! I went to take them from her and realized that she had snapped the arm completely off! They were my brand new frames I just got a few months ago after having used the same frames for almost eight years. The reason I decided to get new frames is because the previous one, while lasting in almost pristine condition for seven years, had been mutilated in the last year several times by Zoe. And, no, I did not just leave them lying around. She grabs them while they are on my face and rips them off. The girl has a grip! I am currently back to my old frames, because, while loose, crooked and full of teeth marks, at least they are still intact.

So far today, everything she has eaten has actually been edible, but I never know when a towel, a Lego, the neighbor's cat, or the van might go missing because Zoe thought it might be fun to eat.

** farmer wolf in Tex Avery's cartoon, Billy Boy

Transcendental Meditation from a Pop-Up

I grew up in a fairly rural area. I didn't think it was rural at the time, but knowing what I know now, it was. We went camping, fishing and yes, I swam in lakes and creeks. I had no problem with that. The old adage, " You can take the girl out of the country but you can't take the country out of the girl." apparently does NOT ring true, though. By my best estimation, it takes around ten years to weasel the aforementioned, "country" out of the girl.

Despite my childhood experiences with the great outdoors, I am now aware that I have become a bit of a city girl. We currently live in a lake community with a public beach on the lake and lifeguards in the summer. Three years ago we went swimming in the lake and emerged covered in some sort of brown slime that stained our suits and proved hard to wash off our skin. The locals told us it was called " cedar water". Whatever it is, it produces stain-inducing slime. I now prefer to only swim in that which is chlorinated.

Back to the present. It is currently five a.m. I've been up since three a.m. We are camping at the NJ shore in a pop-up camper with no heat, no air and no bathroom. Here are my musings thus far:

Two-thirty a.m.: Yes, I KNOW you cannot get frost bite when it is fifty-five degrees outside, but my feet are so cold they're numb, so humor me.

Three a.m : What was THAT!?? Are there coyotes in southern NJ?

Three-thirty a.m.: I'm going to go and choke a chicken. No, that is not a metaphor.. there is a rooster somewhere that has his days and nights confused.

Four a.m.: I decided to just grab the laptop and start recording my musings since I am clearly not sleeping any more tonight. I am seriously so cold, that I am huddled in an intricately-designed cocoon that I have created with my blanket.

** "cocoon"- hmmm.... how ironic I am identifying with my caterpillar friends with whom I have such a tumultuous relationship.

** If you subscribe to the thought that there are no accidents or coincidences, that everything is meant to happen and is some sort of pre-designed Divine plan, then is this the Great Creator's way of having me make peace with the nasty caterpillars? Because I don't know if I can let that go.

** I have to pee. The bathroom is four streets over. I know the walk is good for me, but I prefer to stumble to the bathroom in the middle of the night half-asleep. If I walk that far, I'm going to be good and awake. Isn't that what exercise is FOR? To give you energy and get your blood flowing?

** I decided to take the "city girl" route and drive to the bathroom. Besides, I got to turn the van's heater on on the way over there. It was heavenly. See?? I'm being made to appreciate the simple things. One more night and I can be a Buddhist monk.

**Look at me... I've turned into a flippin' philosopher! Jennaclese ( el vato with the knobby knees) Sorry, I was channeling Cheech Marin for a minute.

** Me thinks Emerson and Thoreau were NOT really one with nature. They simply lost their minds camping and wrote about it and we recognize that today as a literary movement worth studying.

**Totally random.. but really, what is WITH New Jersey jug handles? Why can't you just make a left turn?

** Why does the slightest drop of moisture cause my hair to explode? I CAME from a very humid environment... my ancestors lived in the swamps of Louisiana. I wonder what they used for hair product back in the day?

** Speaking of ancestors... I realize I am spoiled, but I feel I should point out that at least the pioneers that travelled forth in the name of Manifest Destiny and slept out on the open plains had camp fires to keep them warm! Granted, they had to fear attack by wild animals and Indians, but hey, let's not trivialize the mosquitos and rabid rooster I'm dealing with.

** We turned the stove on and the fans to circulate the heat from the stove. It's working a little bit. I can't say I'm WARM... but I am warm-ER. And I see light, so the sun should be up soon to warm up good ole Mother Earth!

** At least both my kids have managed to sleep through this. I could be dealing with chills, rabid roosters and two crying children. For that I am thankful.

** One more thing. We are here for the entire weekend, because I have a performance tonight at eight. It is a one and a half hour drive home from here, so we don't usually get home from this particular performance until well after midnight, so we thought we would bring the pop-up and enjoy the southern most point in NJ. I just checked the weather forecast for tonight ( because it is BEAUTIFUL right now.. since the sun is up) and it says, "wind and thunderstorms likely". Great. I have already been just twenty feet from a lightning strike once already this month. I don't care to do that again.

Stay tuned.... possibly another blog to come....

Sheldon, Shel Silverstein and the Tazmanian Devil

The vast difference in the personalities of my two children provides never-ending entertainment in my house. I was already aware of the differences, but there was a moment Monday evening when it was so profound, that I just had to write it down.

Noah is my "old soul". He's particular, picky, set-in-his-ways, cantankerous and doesn't like change. Zoe is a free spirit. She rolls with the punches, is generally happy and bubbly, a little rough and tough and filled with mischief.

In short, here is Noah :

(That's the character Sheldon Cooper played by Jim Parsons on the Big Bang Theory. If you haven't watched the show, you really should. It's hilarious and Sheldon is a spitting image of Noah's future persona.)

Here is Zoe:

Back to Monday evening. Noah was wrapping up his day of complaining by listing all the reasons why he couldn't go outside. His collection of excuses suddenly reminded me of the Shel Silverstein poem, "Sick". So, I retrieved my book of Shel Silverstein's poems, located that particular one and read it to Noah. He loved it! He asked me to read more to him and so we began thumbing through the book and selecting and reading more of his poems.

At one point, Noah asked me to speak up because he couldn't hear me. I did notice the sudden high volume of noise in the room and stopped to look around. At that very moment, while Noah and I were sitting on the couch reading poetry together, Zoe and DJ were rolling- no, WALLERING (when using the term "wallow" one must use it in proper southern vernacular)- around in the floor head-butting, hair-pulling, wrestling and squealing with delight.

If my life were a movie, this would have been the moment where we flash to a scene in which Noah and I are dressed in our Sunday best while drinking tea and reading poetry in proper British accents with a harpsichord playing in the background and then flash to a scene where DJ and Zoe are dressed in loin cloths rolling around in mud and wrestling for a turkey leg while heavy metal music blares around them.

I'm just sayin'.......

These are the things that go on in my head.

The Joy of Summer!

When you're a kid, summer days stretch before you like endless adventures just waiting to be uncovered. Ahhh.. I remember those days, not a care or responsibility in the world!

And when you're a kid, there are no rules, no boundaries set forth by society. Who says you need a swimsuit to go swimming?? Here is Zoe shortly after taking the slide in her baby pool, shoes and all!

Those are the best days.. the ones that seem uneventful to the adults but are full of pirates and Jedi warriors to those whose imaginations have not yet been overtaken by routine and responsibility.

Yes, to me, it was just another Tuesday; but to my kids, it was the best day ever.

At least until Wednesday.