S-E-X

Every night, our bedtime routine is the same. Everyone, including the dog, walks Noah into his room and tells him good night. I give him a kiss and Zoe climbs up in his bed so she can give him a kiss (and have an excuse to be in his loft bed which she loves). Then, we go to Zoe's room and have to kiss Zoe and various different stuffed animals and wish them all good night.

Last night, Zoe climbed up on Noah's bed to kiss him good night and, like every night, Noah tried to push her away because he doesn't like her kissing him. Except last night, Noah started saying, "No sex, Zoe! NO SEX!! "

I was stunned.

ME: (casually) What did you say?

NOAH: I said, "No sex!"

ME: What does that mean?

NOAH: That's odd. YOU don't know what sex means?

ME: Yes, I know what sex means. I've just never heard you use that word before and was wondering if you knew what it meant.

NOAH: Umm.. YEAH.. it means kissing in bed.

ME: (silently thanking all that is holy that was what he thought it meant) And where did you hear about that?

NOAH: I just know it.

ME: Well, someone had to have said that word or told you what it meant.

NOAH: Nope. I just know it. Kissing in bed.

ME: Well, I just want to say that there is nothing wrong with your three-year-old sister kissing you good night.

NOAH: Okay. You know what else??

ME: (bracing for "what else") What?

NOAH: It smells like poop in here. I think the dog farted! (collapsing in a fit of giggles)

Today I am thankful for:

1. The short attention span of a seven-year-old.

2. The naivete of a seven-year-old.

And most importantly for:

3. The fact that potty humor trumps cool new words that get a rise out of your mother any day.