Noah Bytes

ME: Noah, you can play with your friend tomorrow, if the weather is this nice again.
NOAH: It will be.
ME: I really hope so!
NOAH: It WILL be! I SAW it!
ME: Okay. Calm down, Hurricane Schwartz ( our local meteorologist)!
NOAH: What are hurricane shorts?

Later, while driving in the van:

DJ: I don't understand why they are taking so long to go when the light turns green. Oh, my mistake, they are too busy texting and/or talking on their phone to remember that they are driving!

[from the backseat]

NOAH: I know, that happens to me all the time!

[DJ and I turn around and stare blankly at him]

ME: Son, have you been taking the van out at night while we are sleeping?

NOAH: What!? I mean, when I am playing the Wii and you tell me something. I forget to hear you because I'm so into the game.

Even later while at the restaurant:

Our friends and dinner companions were asking DJ about his new job. He was telling them that he is pretty sure when he is done with training, he is going to be on the night shift and that he will have to work four twelve-hour days with three days off.

NOAH: Mommy, what is the night shift?

ME: It means he will work from 7 at night until 7 in the morning and sleep during the day.

NOAH: So, he's gonna be like a vampire?